I made these 2 questions and they have been closed as too broad, but in my opinion and as i saw, in the opinion of other users too, they aren't broad at all.
There is only one clear question with examples and explanations, can someone help me reopening? I was interested in possible answers and users told me that they wanted to answer but they couldn't.
How to maintain friendships with women, while discouraging romantic feelings?
I'm sorry that you've had some of your questions closed. I know that it can be extremely frustrating, on the objective sites and here, on a site where you're sharing details about yourself, it can feel even worse. Please know that having a question closed isn't a failure and it's not personal.
It's also worth knowing that question closure isn't permanent. If you can edit your question to make it fit the site in terms of breadth or scope, we would love that and, if the community agrees that the new question is more limited, the question will be reopened.
While this site allows a lot of types of questions that other sites do not, we have to set some limits to keep the questions useful and easy to answer. One of the main rules of Stack Exchange is that if an entire book could be written on a subject, it's too broad. How to generally be a friend to someone of the other gender is one of those things. There are millions of ways.
So, how could you edit your question? Tell us more specifically about a friendship you're currently in with a woman that you think is heading towards the lady feeling romantically towards you and ask how to address it with this one woman. It's possible that the answers will apply more broadly but we need more details from you to propose a solution, otherwise, every solution might work, which isn't what Stack Exchange is for. Narrowing the question in this way will make it so that it can be reopened.
For your other question, the end question comes down to:
Do I have to assume this as my personality and keep living this way or I have to try to moderate myself? If yes, how?
You don't even have one question here. What you do in this situation is up to you. If you want to assume that you're stuck being the person you are, there's no reason to ask the question. Similarly, if you feel you have to change because that's what people expect of you, you're unlikely to change, no matter what advice we give.
Before you can change, you have to believe it's possible and want it yourself and then ask for help doing so. Show us that you want to change by asking a more specific question instead:
I tend to offend my friends because I say what I think without filtering it. How can I control what I write/say so that I don't sound rude?
I think we have a couple of questions that are similar to this already, so it may be a duplicate but if your details are different enough, it may be OK.
It seems that you're from Italy - it's possible that adding that information to your questions will help as how we interact is highly cultural. It may not... but it might be interesting to get some input from a fellow Italian or someone familiar with the culture.
I just take the 3 questions you've posted so far. As far as I understand the guidelines of the SE network, and if I properly understood what they mean:
- Do I have to assume this as my personality and keep living this way or I have to try to moderate myself?
-> opinion-based. Why? it's an individual choice, and no one is the same, and will make its choice because of the same arguments / reasons.
- If yes, how?
-> too broad: there are so many way to moderate oneself! How could a 100-lines-answer cover just a slight part of this?
- How can I be friends with a girl without making her fall in love with me?
Ranges from blatantly off-topic to too broad, with opinion-based in the middle of the spectrum. How could you step into someone's mind and prohibit her from having feelings?
You need to narrow down to a question the community can answer, based on facts, references, experience or specific expertise. Until then, it will only attract low-quality answer, useless comments, and down/close votes.
Please think about what you want to achieve, how you can (maybe) split it in several different precisely crafted questions, and what could be the best way to phrase them.
Then, your topics could be re-opened, or deleted and replaced with your new questions.
Close-voting on Interpersonal.StackExchange is fair and consistent. If you do not limit your question to one specific interpersonal problem, 5 people are sure to vote it closed. Questions that are more about our personality in interaction with many other people (although certainly 'interpersonal') are considered too broad for this site. @Catija has already provided a clear guideline to bring one of your questions on topic:
So, how could you edit your question? Tell us more specifically about a friendship you're currently in with a woman that you think is heading towards the lady feeling romantically towards you and ask how to address it with this one woman. (...) Narrowing the question in this way will make it so that it can be reopened.
Why is this suggestion so valuable: because it encapsulates the whole Stack Exchange approach to questions.
A patient and committed user who perseveres in editing their question will get it reopened, learn how close voting works and also learn how to write much better questions, and also get good answers.
Please also read my answer to this other recent meta question by a new user who wants to know why his question was voted closed:
https://interpersonal.meta.stackexchange.com/a/1713/381
Summary: Edit to improve either question, restricting it to a specific interpersonal conflict with clear aims, and I am certain (from personal experience) that the same close-voters will vote to reopen that question!
Go on, try it...
And I am sure you will become a major contributor here.
If you see the question is not worthy to be closed, then you can ask to reopen the question. Then people agreeing to your opinion can start to vote on the reopening.
Please bear in mind that you need 4 other people to reopen a question (5 votes in total). In this current form, I find it hard to do, if not impossible.
You can persuade people to reopen your question, but remember that it can be closed again by 5 people other than the original close-voters. Then you'll need another 5 reopen votes to open that again.
How to persuade people? Talk to them. Prove that your question is worthy to be reopened. You can even change the close voters mind.
The most appropriate way is to edit your question, of course. Listen to others' comments as they hint you closer to reopening. You can request reopen without edit, but most likely it will be ignored by the community.
I don't think your questions are too broad, but I do think they are worthy to stay closed. Can you persuade me to believe otherwise? Please provide your argument on this meta post why your questions fit the site and let's see if you can convince me and others to reopen your question.
