For someone who is shy, interpersonal skills are always a big challenge. It's especially daunting, because there's always an intrapersonal aspect to it, which is generally much harder to overcome than the actual interpersonal issue.
Stack exchange, as a whole, is a lot more hostile of a place than it feels like it was intended to be. The interpersonal / intrapersonal dichotomy issue on Interpersonal SE is a particularly noteworthy example. It's one of the two most friendly SE sites I have been active on, and yet I've seen several people seeking help for their Interpersonal issues get shut down because they had a significant intrapersonal component.
This feels like it's a big problem to this SE, not just for the shy people who are being shut down, but for the SE in general, because the only area where it's really lagging for going prime-time is the questions.
So, what are some tips that people can follow in their questions to enable them to work around the interpersonal issues dealing with the interpersonal SE community? Also, are there any better ways the people who are shutting these questions down could phrase their direction to be more conducive to shy people actually being able to comply with the directions?
This is an example of the sort of question that I feel Interpersonal Skills falls really short on due to the Intrapersonal aspect. Sure, the OP here has an intrapersonal issue, but they also have an interpersonal issue, and that interpersonal issue is likely to blow up on them while they work on the intrapersonal issue. There should be a way to help them deal with the interpersonal issue without requiring that the intrapersonal issue get resolved.
Figuring out how to proceed with ones interpersonal issues while one has an ongoing intrapersonal issue that makes it difficult is a very important life skill, and one of the things that I struggle with on a day to day basis. Finding answers to this is a large part of why I spend a lot of time on this site, and it feels like the active people on this site are doing their best to actively avoid dealing with it. Dealing with the intrapersonal issue is important and off topic for the site, and I don't disagree with either of those points, but life goes on relentlessly despite our intrapersonal hangups.
I realize that this is inserted into this question ungracefully, but I just woke up with the epiphany that this was the sort of question whose handling was what prompted me to feel like I can't actually ask my own questions here. Seeing this question, and having slept on it, I do understand a bit more what it needs to have to be fitting with the site. I do agree that the question is not a good fit as stated, but we should be giving guidance on how to refocus the question rather than just saying "OMG, IntRApersonal issues? Not here! OMG, I can't deal with this!"
I don't have time to give this question the attention it needs to fix it up at just this moment, because life does go on, and I have things I need to do to start my day, but it feels like I need to at least point this stuff out while I can, and then spend time fixing up this question, and fixing up my answer on the reference question to be a proper framing challenge, or otherwise do what I can to explain how it needs to be edited, this evening.