This answer was deleted, and a mod left the following comment:
Hi there. Your post got flagged and automatically deleted because of the video you linked, that was reported to us and that we judged disrespectful towards some users. If you can think of alternatives backup references that are not perceived as discriminating, feel free to raise a mod flag so that we can evaluate for undeletion.
Another deleted answer but this time it's for terrible reasons. It don't want to say it, but...
Blair White is a transgender female. She is a role-model and advocate for trans persons and trans issues. Flagging her commentary is deeply offensive and I don't want to even speculate on what the root of that may be.
If anyone had actually watched the video, it's clear that as a trans person, she wants to be gendered as female naturally and this whole pronoun thing frustrates her and other trans-persons ability to live as their gender.
The whole point is that trans persons put a lot of effort into their transition and respecting their transition is something they want without having to tell everyone every time. This is exactly what OP is facing and why forced pronouns are disrespectful, even if they're not trans.
She was also very clear that you should respect someone's pronouns, when they offer them. When she says 'nobody cares', she means no one cares how you choose to identify and will usually call you whatever you want, if you ask nicely. Again, everyone needs to actually read, and watch. This is a complicated issue, detail and context are very important.
"Warning: this video is openly mocking people who feel hurt by misgendering" This is flat out WRONG!
She clearly explains how it hurt to be mis-gendered early in her transition and how she made the extra effort to be and present as a female so society would accept her as such. And it worked. People correctly assume her gender just like she, and OP want.
To so grossly mis-characterize her transition experience is very saddening.
Blair has contributed hugely to trans acceptance by sharing her experiences with 650K+ Subscribers and at speaking engagements. I consider her a worthy source source for backup on this subject.
If you'd like me to correct any misunderstanding of anything she said, just let me know. I've very happy to explain how things really work in the great wide world.
Oh, I could use ContraPoints (see below) who makes the same case for assuming pronouns based on presentation: Pronouns | ContraPoints. But, I assume that would get flagged too because she's also binary and on the outs due to also pushing back against forced pronouns from...certain groups.
To be clear, these trans women want you to assume they're female, just as OP wants those in their (singular usage, not non-binary) to assume their gender. Their experience is directly related to OP's situation. OP can make a great case by pointing out that this policy is offensive to many trans people, Blair and Natalie are popular for a reason.
So, if a homosexual can't use the two most popular trans commentators for backup on a gender identity issue...I really don't know what to say.
I've been navigating the LGBT community for decades, including all the Byzantine gendering rules without a problem, to say Blair is mocking gendering is laughable and says her and my experience is somehow less important or invalid.
This forum is about Interpersonal Skills, but those skills are based on experiences and if you censor experience due to lack of experience, we're helping no one.
This will be my only defense of the Answer. If I can educate and broaden perspective to restore the Answer, awesome! If not, well, I still have hope.
Let me know if ContraPoints' video would be acceptable. I'd be happy to add it. But Warning! ... but you'll have to watch the entire video ;)
If anyone mis-gendered Blair and flagged her for being anti-trans, well...still problematic but she's has put a lot of effort into her transition and I'm sure she'd take the compliment.
As a huge fan of Blair and all she's done for the community, I will not edit her out of the Answer. Let it remain deleted. But it does tell me a lot.