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Astralbee
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Unfortunately, as much as I enjoy the Interpersonal site, the rules applied to it seem to be based heavily on the rules from the related tech forums. Answers to tech questions may well be binary, but interpersonal matters are not.

Questions are routinely rejected for not including a specific question, which seems fair enough. But knowing the right question to ask can often be the solution, and if a poster knew that question they wouldn't be here, right? So for example, someone who is generally troubled by a friend's behaviour and doesn't know how to handle it (a perfectly reasonable 'interpersonal problem' to me) is forced to re-write their question to include a specific request which invariably ends up as something like 'What do I say to my friend...?'

In reality, solving an interpersonal conflict involves understanding the perspectives of all parties involved. Posters here are encouraged to include as much detail about the situation as they can, but ultimately any question asked by the poster will be one-sided.

Example An employee puts his feet on the desk at work. His manager keeps asking him to take his feet off the desk. This is causing bad feeling in the office.

If the employer came here to seek a solution, their question might be:

"How can I tell my employee to take his feet off the desk?"

Whearas the employeeemployee could just as easily bring the exact same interpersonal problem here, only his question could well be:

"How can I stop my employer nagging me to take my feet off the desk?"

Likely any answers to either questions in the above example would discuss the same issues - should the employee have his feet on the desk? Is it polite? Is there some other kind of solution? But the flaw in the system is that once a question is accepted, any answers are criticised for not directly answering the question. You may side with one sideparty or the other, but ultimately, if you want your answer to be accepted you have to directly answer the question asked by the OP and give some suggested wording.

It's not a perfect system but I suppose that is why it is a beta.

Unfortunately, as much as I enjoy the Interpersonal site, the rules applied to it seem to be based heavily on the rules from the related tech forums. Answers to tech questions may well be binary, but interpersonal matters are not.

Questions are routinely rejected for not including a specific question, which seems fair enough. But knowing the right question to ask can often be the solution, and if a poster knew that question they wouldn't be here, right? So for example, someone who is generally troubled by a friend's behaviour and doesn't know how to handle it (a perfectly reasonable 'interpersonal problem' to me) is forced to re-write their question to include a specific request which invariably ends up as something like 'What do I say to my friend...?'

In reality, solving an interpersonal conflict involves understanding the perspectives of all parties involved. Posters here are encouraged to include as much detail about the situation as they can, but ultimately any question asked by the poster will be one-sided.

Example An employee puts his feet on the desk at work. His manager keeps asking him to take his feet off the desk. This is causing bad feeling in the office.

If the employer came here to seek a solution, their question might be:

"How can I tell my employee to take his feet off the desk?"

Whearas the employee could just as easily bring the exact same interpersonal problem here, only his question could well be:

"How can I stop my employer nagging me to take my feet off the desk?"

Likely any answers to either questions in the above example would discuss the same issues - should the employee have his feet on the desk? Is it polite? Is there some other kind of solution? But the flaw in the system is that once a question is accepted, any answers are criticised for not directly answering the question. You may side with one side or the other, but ultimately, if you want your answer to be accepted you have to directly answer the question asked by the OP and give some suggested wording.

It's not a perfect system but I suppose that is why it is a beta.

Unfortunately, as much as I enjoy the Interpersonal site, the rules applied to it seem to be based heavily on the rules from the related tech forums. Answers to tech questions may well be binary, but interpersonal matters are not.

Questions are routinely rejected for not including a specific question, which seems fair enough. But knowing the right question to ask can often be the solution, and if a poster knew that question they wouldn't be here, right? So for example, someone who is generally troubled by a friend's behaviour and doesn't know how to handle it (a perfectly reasonable 'interpersonal problem' to me) is forced to re-write their question to include a specific request which invariably ends up as something like 'What do I say to my friend...?'

In reality, solving an interpersonal conflict involves understanding the perspectives of all parties involved. Posters here are encouraged to include as much detail about the situation as they can, but ultimately any question asked by the poster will be one-sided.

Example An employee puts his feet on the desk at work. His manager keeps asking him to take his feet off the desk. This is causing bad feeling in the office.

If the employer came here to seek a solution, their question might be:

"How can I tell my employee to take his feet off the desk?"

Whearas the employee could just as easily bring the exact same interpersonal problem here, only his question could well be:

"How can I stop my employer nagging me to take my feet off the desk?"

Likely any answers to either questions in the above example would discuss the same issues - should the employee have his feet on the desk? Is it polite? Is there some other kind of solution? But the flaw in the system is that once a question is accepted, any answers are criticised for not directly answering the question. You may side with one party or the other, but ultimately, if you want your answer to be accepted you have to directly answer the question asked by the OP and give some suggested wording.

It's not a perfect system but I suppose that is why it is a beta.

Improved answer based on constructive comments.
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Astralbee
  • 27k
  • 7
  • 7

Unfortunately, as much as I enjoy the Interpersonal site, the rules applied to it seem to be based heavily on the rules from the related tech forums. Answers to tech questions may well be binary, but interpersonal matters are not.

Questions seem to beare routinely rejected for not beingincluding a specific enoughquestion, which seems fair enough, but not every human dilemma. But knowing the right question to ask can often be phrased in the form ofsolution, and if a poster knew that question. Someone they wouldn't be here, right? So for example, someone who is generally troubled by a friend's behaviour and doesn't know how to handle it (a perfectly reasonable 'interpersonal problem' to me) is forced to re-write their question to include a specific request which invariably ends up as something like 'What do I say to my friend...?'

TheIn reality, solving an interpersonal conflict involves understanding the perspectives of all parties involved. Posters here are encouraged to include as much detail about the situation as they can, but ultimately any question asked by the poster will be one-sided.

Example An employee puts his feet on the desk at work. His manager keeps asking him to take his feet off the desk. This is causing bad feeling in the office.

If the employer came here to seek a solution, their question might be:

"How can I tell my employee to take his feet off the desk?"

Whearas the employee could just as easily bring the exact same interpersonal problem here, only his question could well be:

"How can I stop my employer nagging me to take my feet off the desk?"

Likely any answers to either questions in the above rule also meansexample would discuss the same issues - should the employee have his feet on the desk? Is it polite? Is there some other kind of solution? But the flaw in the system is that once a question is accepted, any answers are criticised for not directly answering the question. UltimatelyYou may side with one side or the other, but ultimately, if you want your answer to be accepted you have to directly answer the question asked by the OP and give some suggested wording.

It's not a perfect system but I suppose that is why it is a beta.

Unfortunately, as much as I enjoy the Interpersonal site, the rules applied to it seem to be based heavily on the rules from the related tech forums. Answers to tech questions may well be binary, but interpersonal matters are not.

Questions seem to be routinely rejected for not being specific enough, which seems fair enough, but not every human dilemma can be phrased in the form of a question. Someone who is generally troubled by a friend's behaviour and doesn't know how to handle it (a perfectly reasonable 'interpersonal problem' to me) is forced to re-write their question to include a specific request which invariably ends up as something like 'What do I say to my friend...?'

The above rule also means that once a question is accepted, any answers are criticised for not directly answering the question. Ultimately, if you want your answer to be accepted you have to give some suggested wording.

It's not a perfect system but I suppose that is why it is a beta.

Unfortunately, as much as I enjoy the Interpersonal site, the rules applied to it seem to be based heavily on the rules from the related tech forums. Answers to tech questions may well be binary, but interpersonal matters are not.

Questions are routinely rejected for not including a specific question, which seems fair enough. But knowing the right question to ask can often be the solution, and if a poster knew that question they wouldn't be here, right? So for example, someone who is generally troubled by a friend's behaviour and doesn't know how to handle it (a perfectly reasonable 'interpersonal problem' to me) is forced to re-write their question to include a specific request which invariably ends up as something like 'What do I say to my friend...?'

In reality, solving an interpersonal conflict involves understanding the perspectives of all parties involved. Posters here are encouraged to include as much detail about the situation as they can, but ultimately any question asked by the poster will be one-sided.

Example An employee puts his feet on the desk at work. His manager keeps asking him to take his feet off the desk. This is causing bad feeling in the office.

If the employer came here to seek a solution, their question might be:

"How can I tell my employee to take his feet off the desk?"

Whearas the employee could just as easily bring the exact same interpersonal problem here, only his question could well be:

"How can I stop my employer nagging me to take my feet off the desk?"

Likely any answers to either questions in the above example would discuss the same issues - should the employee have his feet on the desk? Is it polite? Is there some other kind of solution? But the flaw in the system is that once a question is accepted, any answers are criticised for not directly answering the question. You may side with one side or the other, but ultimately, if you want your answer to be accepted you have to directly answer the question asked by the OP and give some suggested wording.

It's not a perfect system but I suppose that is why it is a beta.

corrected to please a pedant
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Astralbee
  • 27k
  • 7
  • 7

Unfortunately, as much as I enjoy this forumthe Interpersonal site, the rules applied to it seem to be based heavily on the rules from the related tech forums. Answers to tech questions may well be binary, but interpersonal matters are not.

Questions seem to be routinely rejected for not being specific enough, which seems fair enough, but not every human dilemma can be phrased in the form of a question. Someone who is generally troubled by a friend's behaviour and doesn't know how to handle it (a perfectly reasonable 'interpersonal problem' to me) is forced to re-write their question to include a specific request which invariably ends up as something like 'What do I say to my friend...?'

The above rule also means that once a question is accepted, any answers are criticised for not directly answering the question. Ultimately, if you want your answer to be accepted you have to give some suggested wording.

It's not a perfect system but I suppose that is why it is a beta.

Unfortunately, as much as I enjoy this forum, the rules applied to it seem to be based heavily on the rules from the related tech forums. Answers to tech questions may well be binary, but interpersonal matters are not.

Questions seem to be routinely rejected for not being specific enough, which seems fair enough, but not every human dilemma can be phrased in the form of a question. Someone who is generally troubled by a friend's behaviour and doesn't know how to handle it (a perfectly reasonable 'interpersonal problem' to me) is forced to re-write their question to include a specific request which invariably ends up as something like 'What do I say to my friend...?'

The above rule also means that once a question is accepted, any answers are criticised for not directly answering the question. Ultimately, if you want your answer to be accepted you have to give some suggested wording.

It's not a perfect system but I suppose that is why it is a beta.

Unfortunately, as much as I enjoy the Interpersonal site, the rules applied to it seem to be based heavily on the rules from the related tech forums. Answers to tech questions may well be binary, but interpersonal matters are not.

Questions seem to be routinely rejected for not being specific enough, which seems fair enough, but not every human dilemma can be phrased in the form of a question. Someone who is generally troubled by a friend's behaviour and doesn't know how to handle it (a perfectly reasonable 'interpersonal problem' to me) is forced to re-write their question to include a specific request which invariably ends up as something like 'What do I say to my friend...?'

The above rule also means that once a question is accepted, any answers are criticised for not directly answering the question. Ultimately, if you want your answer to be accepted you have to give some suggested wording.

It's not a perfect system but I suppose that is why it is a beta.

Source Link
Astralbee
  • 27k
  • 7
  • 7
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