I recently answered a query - my first - on this site and was helped by someone who explained that my answer was "down-voted" because it did not answer the specific query. I thanked the person and edited my response to ensure it addressed the question. Since then, my response has been deleted by three people! How can this happen? How can my response be considered so far off track (which it wasn't) that it was deleted.
Is this a site where only a favoured few are allowed to answer questions?
One of the particular nuances of this site is that while most of the questions are about some problem that the OP is having, the answers should be about the application of an interpersonal skill rather than just a solution to the problem.
There are two reasons your answer was deleted. It doesn't offer an interpersonal solution to the problem, and it doesn't actually answer the OP's question. Your answer basically says "Fly on a different airline" which doesn't answer the OP's question about how to politely refuse requests to switch seats.
Deleted posts can be undeleted by moderator action or by 3 votes from high rep users. If you edit your post to answer the OP's question you can flag your post for moderator attention and they can undelete it if it is now a good fit for this site.
Since then, my response has been deleted by three people! How can this happen? How can my response be considered so far off track (which it wasn't) that it was deleted.
I reviewed the first revision of your answer:
Fly on an Australian airline where you are allocated a seat and you have no choice but to stay there. Even on a half full flight, the cabin crew ask you not to move seats.
It's your seat, why would anyone even think you'd want to give it up.
Now, that's on the short side, it assumes the OP can fly on an Australian airline all the time, and doesn't really answer the question asked, which is how to most politely decline when asked to switch seats. So yeah, that definitely fell in the 'Not an Answer' category here on Interpersonal Skills, since we'd like answers to address the Interpersonal Skill rather than just provide a life-hack.
Sadly, once a delete vote is cast on an answer, it can't be retracted. It doesn't age away either, as far as I know. Also, I won't be notified by the system once a post I voted on is edited.
That doesn't mean your answer can never be undeleted (although I think right now it needs more work). Three people or a moderator can undelete it and the system allows editing of deleted posts to make them fit for Interpersonal Skills. Just like questions are closed so they can be improved, a deleted answer won't hurt you, it will prevent further downvotes and give you the time to edit it into shape at your own leisure.
You edited your answer before it was deleted, to add:
As someone said earlier, this is not your problem so, if you feel you cannot decline politely, ask the cabin crew to sort out the seating arrangements.
I think that's still not quite enough: it deals with what the OP can do after the thing they're asking about, which is declining politely in the first place. Some guidance on how to approach the cabin crew and something to back up that this will work (and the crew won't look at you like you're crazy) would be nice.
Is this a site where only a favoured few are allowed to answer questions?
I certainly hope not! But since this site is both about a subjective topic and still in beta (which means rules change over time), participating here can be a bit confusing in the beginning ;-)
Take a look at this meta where each answer outlines one of the things we expect from an answer, with links to other meta posts explaining the reasoning behind those expectations.
So, if you'd like to have your answer undeleted:
Once you've edited a deleted answer into shape (or if you want further feedback on what is needed to get it undeleted) you can ask about that here on meta. The same goes for if you ever need more feedback on getting a closed question into shape. Meta is the place where you can ask questions about the things happening on the main site.
Personally I don't believe so. I have seen a complaint from one user about one of the higher-ranked members, but that's been about it.
Sometimes technology and people don't work as well together as we would like. When I review a queue of flagged posts, I make the assumption that it hasn't been edited since it was flagged and that I'm seeing the most current version. Maybe that's not always the case.
Whatever the case may be, however, I can only review what's in front of me at the time. So I base my decision to delete on what I see at that point in time.
I've had posts deleted, edited in ways I didn't like, downvoted, and responded to in ways that I hadn't anticipated. But I've never had the feeling like "I'm not one of the 'in' crowd". I'd suggest this: keep trying. There's a certain way to answer questions that seems to be more successful than others; generally that involves being nice to others and encouraging interpersonal skills to develop. You may hit an answer that you hadn't anticipated being loved by the readers here; that can help your reputation quite quickly.
If you did re-write your answer and it met all the criteria for a quality answer then no, it isn't right that it still got deleted. But you pretty much admit that you dove in and wrote an answer without any real knowledge of how the site works, and once a post gets flagged for deletion the site invites other users to review it, so by that point people are looking at your post with a critical eye.
This is a question and answer site. The idea is that the answers will stand the test of time and be useful to other people with the same or similar questions - that is why direct answers and good detail is required to backup your answer.
Though it may not be a perfect system, it IS possible to work with the framework and provide good answers. Familiarising yourself with the rules of the site is one thing, but you should spend some time reading questions, answers, and the comments too - that way you will see how it works in practice. As it stands, you've written one poor answer and then gone stright to complaining about how it was received.
Having taken on board all the helpful responses and suggestions that my question generated, I think I can now answer it for myself. My considered opinion, after reading a lot of answered questions, as well as some of the Meta discussion and chats, is that this is a site that wants to exclude people. In saying this, I don't mean that the site wants to exclude people in a discriminatory way, but I do meant that its aim is to encourage a certain type of person here, rather than encourage all comers.
In support of my answer, I refer to two pages that I mentioned in the comment above - How to get a better sense of community going and Shog's rules for IPS. The former touches on my own concern that this site is not encouraging to new comers and the latter states quite clearly who should not be on the site and what the people on the site should be doing.
I won't be surprised if this answer is taken to task or even deleted but I decided to post it anyway because I would like to say that I appreciated the discussion.
